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concert etiquette

There’s something you should know about me, especially after reading most of these posts. I hate a lot of things. There are a lot of things that make my blood boil. One of those things is other people. Other people suck. If you don’t feel like this, you should probably go out more. Usually, I try to avoid being in large groups. Because people suck. But there are times when it’s unavoidable. And it seems like the worst in people is brought out in large crowds.

Now what I don’t hate is music. Especially seeing artists perform live. And that’s where my problems arise. I’m not rich. So I can’t afford a private show by the artist in my living room. It’s a sad reality for most of us. So I have to go see them in concert.

A concert is essentially combining something I love with something I hate. Usually what I love (the music) drowns out what I hate (everyone else), so I’ve yet to really have a negative concert experience. But there are still instances where my hatred for fellow man can’t be ignored. It seems as if all the biggest assholes in the world have conglomerated in to one room on a quest to ruin my one on one time with ______________ (musical act).

Usually it’s just one annoying thing, so my whole experience isn’t ruined and I just forget about it and enjoy the show. But this last concert was different.

I went to see Lorde at Danforth Music Hall thanks to a friend of mine providing a great early birthday present. She was flawless (read my review of her debut album here if you haven’t), but this isn’t about her. This is about everyone else there. It seems that every type of possible “concert asshole” was in attendance that night. Here’s a list of “concert assholes,” please don’t let this be you.

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